so, here is my list of things i think you should know about good ol NC suburban malls:
1. mall food courts still suck.
they are just as bad as they have always been. except worse because here all of the asian ladies are yelling at you to try their sweet and sour chicken. things i have eaten in the past 2 days: a FSAD cold panini, some chick-fil-a waffle fries, the worst fish&chips ive ever encountered that i took 2 bites of and vomiked in my mouth, an egg, a piece of toast, a side salad from chick-fil-a, one more waffle fry, dippin dots, and a multigrain roll. and about 78231481269 americanos. im wired out of my fucking mind. and hungry cause everything i try to eat tastes like barf.
2. mall walkers start at 7:30 am.
yes. people come to the mall to exercise. they bring their disc-men and FUPA packs and walk around the mall over and over again. alone. and they look at you weird when you are walking around with an itouch looking for the slightest bit of free wireless to check the team olson blog. mind your own beeswax mallwalkers. just go eat some cinnabon.
3. hollister plays the same 3 songs over and over again.
and their store smells like i just stuck my face into a highschool jocks armpit.
4. massage chairs are the shit.
i spend about 2 hours of my day today in a massage chair in brookstone. most. amazing. thing. ever. it costs $4000 and feels like you are being punched all over. in a good way. the dude in brookstone started bringing cool shit over to me and showing it to me. for example: a sweet remote control helicopter that he almost dropped on my head, a nyt digital reader, some slide scanner thing, some slippers, one of those stuffed animal soft things that m2 bought kmo and m1 for xmas last year, and some crazy future eye-viewer thing that you would watch movies on. (2d will have that tomorrow) oh yeah, and he loves iphones. so we talked about those for awhile and all the apps he would get if he had one. he also told me all of the mall drama that was going on and where other new stores were being built, and that he spends 50-60 hours a week there. then i got his number.
(hahaha pause not. just wanted to freak you out)
5. twelve year old boys are badass.
one of them winked at me.
6. nincompoops work at mall kiosks.
dude who does the hiring for these things. they are some of the most socially inept people i've met in awhile. they try to sell you all sorts of shit and then you ask them how much it costs and they have to go look it up in their binder. and then you walk away and walk by them an hour later and they forget you ever existed. if i ever have to look at a pile of clip on ponytails (sorry m2 im not hatin) or cellphone covers again im probably gonna MBO.
7. christmas music. all day. is evil.
gag me already its not even tgivs.
8. teenage couples are NOT cute.
do people still hold hands and walk around the mall buying things from yankee candle. apparently so.
9. velour suits and ugg boots.
thats all i have to say about that.
10. things im into: applying a full face at sephora on lunch break.
yupp. after eating my side salad and drinking some lemonade i went and applied a full face at sephora. i even tried diors lip venom thing so my lips were tingling for 2 hours after lunch while i was doing stuff on site. it did work though, all the workers were nice to me and asking me how i was doing and if they could help with anything. SCORE.
okay thats it. its 1am and i have a MFCSFSAD wake up call at 630 am.
NOTE: as much as it sounds like i didnt do anything all day, keep in mind that i was at this mall for 14 hours and sometimes there were so many people on site that you had to get out of there and give them room. and cfl i wanted some stories to tell.
18 more hours til we meet again team o. can't fucking wait. good night.
love, amo
1 comment:
Ha.
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