One night after the bars we decided to take it to the stoop to continue the party. The scene was this... PMJ, Me, and a person will call the Persian Prince (PP) were just sitting throwing a few back. Then PP was approached by an old high school buddy. The buddy saw the scene and instantly inserted himself. Wasnt asked.... wasnt invited... just sat down and decided to stay. Whatevs. This wouldnt have been a problem until this character started talking about his sexual escapades. I dont know if he thought this was a big dick contest or what but he immediately started discussing a sexual endurance. No one asked. NO ONE.
" Yeah well I think I could easily be in porn. I mean I see things they do in those movies and in the magazines and I think its way easy. I mean when I have sex I go for at least 4 to 6 hours. The first 2 hours I spend just eating pussy."
Responses were as follows:
PMJ - " What the fuck?!"
PP - ***Laughter***
MH - ***Anger***
At that point I wanted to tell this dude to get the hell off the stoop. First of all you werent invited, and second of all dont dirty up the stoop with your trash talk about eating box for a ridiculous amount of time buddy. So I called him a douche and had to exit stage left.
Which brings me to my point... I feel all of us women can thank porn stars for giving this false idea that we LOOOOOVVVEEEEEE having sex for HOURS! No sorry. Not true. Unless your Sting and youre in some type of trance thats not happening. I have things to do... Ok? I dont need to lay under you for 4 to 6 hours. I need to eat dinner, go pick up my dry cleaning, or go to Yoga.... or whatever!!! Who cares! Im not into laying on my back watching the top of your head for 2 hours. I mean maybe if I was doing a wicked Sudoku but even then I need all the concentration I can get. So start spreading the word. Get in and get out.
MH |
2 comments:
This blog is slightly inaccurate. I did probably say WTF? But I am 100% sure that I said, "4-6 hours, really? wow whatta stud. I'm a bit of a premature ejaculator myself. I usually get like 4 to 6 pumps in before its all over and I'm saying, sorry baby, can we try again"?
Yes.... yes... you did say that. Great. Glad we got that covered. For one day I wish we could go without you talking about your premature ejaculation problem. See if NIH has a clinical trial for that.
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